Paradigm Shift…

melancholy shadow woman

΅〜  ೋ  ೋ 〜΅

That last desperate flamboyance of wallowing in a world of wishes…

Blissfully ignorant…

Only to wake to the insidious lie hidden in time…

Brought forward to wake you from the otherwhere of this evanescent dream…

Dividing itself from reality through a gossamer veil…

Echoes of reminiscence whisper from the other side…

Memory by memory…

Fading…

 ΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅

Paradigm shift…

 ~

΅〜  ೋ  ೋ 〜΅

     ΅〜 ೋ  Christina〜  ೋ 〜΅

Diaphanous Dreamscape….

girl white rose

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I look back trying to find illumination…
Seeking my inspiration…
Pivotal points of perception…
I search for my words…
They’ve left me in the desert of my reality…

΅∼ ∼΅ 

Transport me to my dreamscape…
Let me reside there…
Where words float around me like butterflies of serenity…
Whispering promises of peace…
A balm to soothe my soul…
My self expression…needing release…aching for it…

΅∼ ∼΅ 

I search the depths of my heart…
I see the tears…
The sadness…
The scars I choose to wear inside…
Remembrance of days gone…memories packed away…

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I see with hindsight a succession of happenings…
I see the struggle…
The very battle for my sanity ~ end with the discovery of my voice…
My words…
Each little nuance distinctively mine…

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I see pieces of me creating my sanctuary…
My oasis built from the words woven in my mind…
All ways there waiting for me….
A bouquet of thought…

΅∼ ∼΅ 

 This is my diaphanous dreamscape…
A reflection of me…
My creation…
Born from the ashes of my former life…
Now the foundation on which I rebuild….
~
~

΅〜  ೋ  ೋ 〜΅

     ΅〜 ೋ  Christina〜  ೋ 〜΅

For Loss of Words ~ Second Anniversary…

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Two years ago, on June 17th, 2012, I wrote my first post for this blog. I had no idea then all that could happen…would happen…it most certainly marked an epoch in my life. An epoch I am ceaselessly grateful for and feel it one of the most impactful changes in my life.

Shortly thereafter, I met Neil, my admiration of his writing was instantaneous, as was our friendship. On August 30, 2012 we published our first collaboration. It was such an incredible honor to read his words which I so admire. I had never attempted anything like this before…it was the beginning of future audio and video collaborations with Neil, followed by a few vlogs of my own.

 An excerpt from my “Christina ~ Out Loud” page…

Neil…thank you so much sweet sir…you are a star who will always shine so bright in my night sky. A friend who helped pull me out of myself and try something new and so so fun!”

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I wish to say thank you to everyone who has been along this journey with me, encouraged me, inspired me, and given me your steadfast support… with special gratitude to Neil who opened the door to new possibilities…new dreams…who encouraged me out of my shell.

Each one of you add so much to my life…

Transforming it from darkness into a rainbow of dreams…

~

΅〜  ೋ  ೋ 〜΅

     ΅〜 ೋ  Christina〜  ೋ 〜΅

Melody of Silence…

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Reflections of silence resonate…
Dissonant deliberation…
Among the ethereal scintilla…
Echoes speak in deafening taciturnity…
Melody of Silence…

 ΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅

Through the maze of countless corridors…
Myriad of memories…
A forest of dreams…of hopes…
Therein lies my hidden sanctuary…
Dormant…
Awaiting its incendiary denouement…

΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅

Ephemeral illumination…
Fragments of time reminisce…
Whispering in the familiar shadows…
 Euphony…
~

΅〜  ೋ ೋ 〜΅

     ΅〜 ೋ  Christina〜  ೋ 〜΅

Subliminal Madness…

subliminal madness 2

΅〜 ೋღ ღೋ     〜΅

It begins with a thought…

A revelation…

Usually bound in truth…

Then it propagates endless pieces of an unsolvable puzzle…

It worms its way through you…

Permeating Peace…

Replacing it with doubt…fear…

Insidious imaginings…

Every thought becomes tainted with it…

It increases exponentially…

Invasive…

Intruding every facet of your life…

Your dreams once made you strong…

Now they’ve become the manifestation of your subliminal madness…

Become waking confusion…

Conflict…

Psychological war…

Devastation…

΅〜 ೋღ ღೋ     〜΅

A small ray of light shines through…

Amber sunrise…

You feel its warmth reach for you…

You watch it ascend wondering if its golden rays can reach you…

So far buried in your darkness…

It whispers…

Beckoning…

Inexorably…

~

~

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅

    ΅〜 ೋღ  Christina ~  ೋღ 〜΅

 

Hidden…

mask MariaAmanda on deviantart

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅    

Can you read the space between my words?

Though unsaid…perhaps subtly felt?

The very tool of my destruction…
Simultaneously my resurrection…

Delicately haunting…

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅    

The more rare…
The more innovative…
Probable possibilities of persuasion…
Obscuring me…
Shielding…
Protecting…

Can I tempt you?
Fascinate you?
Entice you?

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅    

Would you look beyond this masquerade I’ve so cleverly crafted?

Would you truly seek me with an exigent desire to unequivocally know me?

Would you rather believe the interpretation of my rendition…

Or keep me here where my words only serve…

Emulation’s illumination…

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅    

Should you wish it…

I am here…
Hidden…

~

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅

    ΅〜 ೋღ  Christina ~  ೋღ 〜΅

~

 Gorgeous photo by MariaAmanda ~ deviantart

Iridescence…

iridesence by princehenebeng

΅〜 ೋღ ღೋ     〜΅    

She watches the cerulean twilight shimmer iridescence…

Thoughts swirl like butterflies in a dance of dreams…
Glitter inspiration…
Igniting illumination…
Kaleidoscope…

΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅

Lost in amongst these very thoughts….

She writes her soul…
Bared for all…
Illuminated…
Transparent…
Vulnerable visions lie cloaked in ephemeral euphoria…

΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅
Yes…
Here are her words…her voice…
Her essence…
Growing in Night’s elucidation…

~

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅

    ΅〜 ೋღ  Christina ~  ೋღ 〜

~

Image by princehenebeng

Colloquy with Christina 〜

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This is not a typical style of post for me, but hey…we all have to mix things up every now and then right?! I would never wish to become predictable.  I am writing this to share some exciting news! First, will be a gradual changing of my last name.  I have given this much thought… the tipping point for me was that after much needed and cherished encouragement, I am indeed beginning to compile my poems for a book.

writing quill and notebookThat alone is a rather frightening endeavor for me….frightening and exquisitely exhilarating at the same time! You each have been so very amazing and supportive… I wish to thank you all ever so much for continuing to read, like, comment, follow….this journey. So…while the title for said book is up for debate in my mind…my name is not.

I have considered how you all know me first and foremost as “Christina ~” and secondly…”Christina Brownlee”. For reasons too numerous to explain, I have decided to take back my maiden name for this literary journey I’m embarking on.

Going forward I will be…on this blog then expanding to all the various social media sites, and most especially for any future book(s)…known as…Christina M. Gregory 〜  

It is my most fervent desire, even if my book only sees two sales…it will be with the name my mother gave me, one that includes my brother…his wife and family, and my father…the family who was there in all ways during my darkest hours…it is their name I wish to represent. Besides, I lived with that name for over half my life and I am rather fond of it!

Now that I’ve shared my exciting news re: a poetry anthology with you,  I will also share that I am full of ideas simmering for other projects…some I won’t mention (yet) because I do love to be enigmatic.vintage book flowers

I have another reason for sharing with you all and that my friends is *Accountability*. I know the moment I post this…I am now accountable to see this through. I will not be able to ‘conveniently’ forget, get overwhelmed, too nervous, etc.〜 Though, I do beg for your patience as being a single mom raising 3 kids while running a household does put tremendous demands on my ability to have much free time.

I will share a small hint because I adore you all…I chose this particular title for a reason…the hint? I will use this title for further updates, musings (maybe), and…well….perhaps a few surprises along the way…

Again, I wish to thank each of you for your cherished support and encouragement over these past two years. You are priceless!

~

Christina M. Gregory ~

΅〜 ೋღ ღೋ     〜΅

~

Photos via Google Images

Echo Remembrance…

time tumblr deviantart by xetobyte

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Facile vagaries
A whisper through time…
Echo remembrance…
Refulgent prisms beam fluid vibration…
Perception’s promise…
Elusive…
Vague…
Enigmatic…
Longing…
Needing…
Reverberating…

~

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅

    ΅〜 ೋღ  Christina ~  ೋღ 〜

Photo by xetobyte deviantart tumblr

Flirtation With Denial…

Flirting with Denial Forbidden_fruit_by_Nataly1st

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Presumptive perception…
Hypocritical hypotheses…
She never knew…
Never cared to find truth…
Too mired in bitter disappointment…
Averting ignorance…
Blatant flirtation with denial…
Feeding self-gratification’s insistent need…

΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅
She only cared for indulgence…
Her voracious need to be desired…
No thought to its destructive aftermath…
She doesn’t mind the cost for she thinks it’s someone else’s debt…

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Duteous devotion…
Enchantment’s spell broken…
Crystalline vision…
Truth’s dichotomy revealed in Ego’s insatiable delight…

΅〜 ೋღ ❁ ღೋ      〜΅
She seeks selfish seduction…
Unknowingly denying herself what she needs most…
True love’s healing embrace…

~

΅〜 ೋღ  ღೋ     〜΅

    ΅〜 ೋღ  Christina ~  ೋღ 〜

~

Gorgeous photo by Nataly1st ~ Deviantart